Permission to Propose and the 'Dowery' reminder...

So a few hours after I got off the plane from the 'wild west' last week, I picked up my car and went over to my girlfriend's adopted parent's house.

To update those not familiar:

My girlfriend is an immigrant from a country out west of Hawaii & East of England. For the past 10 years she has lived with friends of her real parents who are American and who she calls MOM & DAD - I call them her adopted parents. I've been in contact with her real father via e-mail, have already asked him for her hand and he said yes and soon after mentioned the fact that his culture believes in 'bride price' or a dowry...

So I went over to her adopted parent's house in order to ask them for permission to marry their adopted daughter as well. After a nice conversation they said they would give their blessing.

They also mentioned that they have told & will continue to tell my girlfriend's real parents that 'bride price' is not something that's realistic here in the U.S.

However, toward the end of the conversation they did sort of hint at the fact that marrying without a 'bride price' in there culture is similar to "shackin' up" or having kids out of wedlock - while still living together in U.S. culture...say 30 yrs ago, seeing as it's pretty much an accepted fact today. Vow's apparently mean nothing to them it's all about the dollar bills.

This bugs me quite a bit to say the least- the whole idea of purchasing my bride completely cheapens it for me. Does that mean she becomes my slave if I pay the bride price?

You can see how a family that has struggled for generations to overcome the implications of slavery (like mine) and a family that has sort of had some slave-like ideas ingrained into their culture (like hers) could eventually come at odds.

Just in case you're wondering a conservative guess on a 'bride price' amount is somewhere in the range of $10,000-$20,000 - something I have no intention of paying anytime soon.

June 2007 Net worth, and other news...

So I went to www.networthiq.com/ and set up a 'Net Worth Account" and it almost made feel better about the fact that the Amusement Park won the battle of the budget yesterday.

Assuming, I posted the link correctly, it appears that my net worth is somewhere about $1,000 more than I was expecting it to be based off of my original Guesstimate of $4-5K.

Yesterday, though me and my girlfriend went to an Amusement Park and brought with us packed lunches and snacks in a large book bag in order to avoid paying for much past admission. Of course it appears that this particular Amusement Park has gotten wise to this frugal practice; as we attempted to get in line for our first ride we were immediately stopped and informed that 'no backpacks or bags' are NOT allowed in line. Seeing as we did not want to walk all the way back to the entrance and then through parking lot in order to put the bag back. we decided to use the convenient, 1-time use lockers for $2 a pop.

We rode a couple other rides without the bag and then we both got hungry. So we went back to the locker - had our packed lunch and brought some packed water bottles along with us for the wait. We then dropped off our bag again for another $2 and proceeded to ride some more rides for a couple hours. My girlfriend paid for parking($10) and gas($27) - I paid for admission($60).

Towards the mid afternoon - early evening- My girlfriend mentioned that she was hungry, I mentioned that I was again broke, and she quickly mentioned how she paid for parking and gas and the park food smelt 'really good'. Of course I gave in and regrettably went to the ATM where I was quickly charged with a $2.50 for the 'privilege' of using their ATM (I guessing my bank charged $2.50 as well for going outside their network) and taking out a whopping $20.

We went to get her a turkey leg for $5-something and a burger and fry combo for me for 8- something - when tax was added I had just spent nearly $15 for quite possibly the worst burger I've ever paid for. At which point I began to get upset because I knew my bank account was quickly approaching the single digits. We headed back to her place shortly after this.

I was grumpy the whole way home but luckily, we talked about it and I brought up the fact that her father had mentioned a dowry/bride price last time I emailed him. She said she had explained to him and her mom that that's not the way we do things here in the USA and she would have a talk with him and let him know we (I) won't be paying any 'bride price' anytime soon - if at all. That took a lot of pressure off me psychologically.

I also made a guesstimate calculation (in my head) on whether I can pay off my credit card debt by the end of July. - It turns out I can, If I knock my money market savings down to just under a thousand dollars. I don't think I'm comfortable doing that though but, we'll see.